Last time, I analyzed the arguments Hillary and Obama have been throwing at each other.
This time, I analyze the metaphysical and literary undertones of this titanic struggle between political behemoths caught in an epic battle of [insert more hyperbole here to underscore sense of importance].
My big conclusion: Hillary Clinton is a vampire. Let’s look at the evidence:
- Her campaign is half-dead (having lost 11 primaries)
- You can keep shooting her (more political setbacks and defeats), but she just won’t die.
- She makes people like her by sucking their blood (think negative attack ads)
- She is apparently up at 3 AM
So, what does this make Barack Obama? Well, duh… Blade.
We all know that Barack Obama has to take a serum to prevent himself from going evil.
And this would of course mean that John McCain — the man who also refuses die and is capable of defeating a Mormon and a minister — Deacon Frost:
Yes, it was a slower day at work today.